brittany nicole

Ahhhhh I can’t believe that I’ve been paying for my site to be active all year and I’ve not made the time to be active on here. I’ve been so busy lately that by the time I get home and put the car in park (yes! I turn it off.), some nights I’ve fallen asleep in my car. I look forward to the days that I work a 9-5pm and I find myself getting home in time to cook and clean, then go to bed at a decent hour. Sounds like a blessing that I know many take for granted.

Maybe you’re here because of the title. Maybe you’re here because this blog was shared with you. Maybe you’re here because you’re messy. Whatever the case may be, welcome back to my blog where I pour my heart into inspiring others through the highs and lows of life.

A chapter closing could be considered a low. And it isn’t always a bad thing. It’s a blessing honestly. I thought this would be a goodbye message on all things B Nicole Inspiring Souls…

And maybe in my mind, I am saying goodbye to the old way of doing things. See there’s still so much that I haven’t shared or addressed through my platform. I don’t have a large following but this year I had someone mention that I’m not aware of the many people that read my blog and enjoy how transparent I am when I share. The kicker is that I’m a private person and I only share what I feel comfortable sharing. I saw this post on Instagram and shared it to my story this week because it’s me all day, every day…

https://www.instagram.com/p/CWYbuaflpTc/

Here’s my truth in caption form “I’ve been struggling with what to share because it’s all a part of me and at times I feel like I’m giving a little bit more of myself away every little bit I share. I also know that’s how I’ve met some of you. You’re here because of what I’ve shared that spoke directly to you. Currently navigating between privacy and keeping some of it.”

Let me show you what I mean by this…

So I was supposed to start a book club in Spring 2020 for those interested in dissecting “Relationship Goals” by Pastor Mike Todd. Best idea ever!!! I didn’t think many would reach out. But I was so wrong. So what happened within the same week of making this post?

https://www.instagram.com/p/CAOhcpCFXRl/

Well, I no longer felt qualified in leading the discussion after 7.5 years of abstaining from sex and falling into a trap that I walked into freely. Such poor judgment on my behalf too because the guy ghosted me after that. It was like he knew I was waiting (we talked about it often) and he made it a bucket list item for himself. I felt like a failure and soooooooo stupid for not knowing his intentions. Looking back on it, I trusted him and let my guard down a little. Now I know: He never wanted anything more from me and sometimes in life, you have to find things out the hard way. To my surprise, I let him fly freely. I didn’t go chasing after him for answers or for closure. That confirmed to me that I had matured over the years. My confidence took a major blow though and I just didn’t have the strength to follow through on the book club idea event though many women showed interest. Maybe the book club would have given me some of my confidence and strength back. Maybe I could have helped someone else not fall into temptation like I did. Maybe, it’s not too late to help others be reminded that starting over carries purpose too…

So for the remainder of the year, I’ll be working through how to document my journey in the most effective way and closing this chapter soon of hiding from the internet…

I am blessed with a platform that requires me to own my truth, not hide behind it.

I am blessed with a platform that requires me to own my truth, not hide behind it.

I am blessed with a platform that requires me to own my truth, not hide behind it.

Signed,

Starting over…

#BNspired2day