my greek life experience

So I’m not sure what direction this blog will go in but I feel led to share, so here goes something…

These views are my own and do not reflect my employer or any greek organization.

So to be clear, I do work in greek life at the university level. It’s been such an eye-opening experience and reminds me daily of my undergraduate days. I love being an advisor in this capacity because I’m simply there to give advice. I get paid to share my personal opinion on different topics: event planning, membership engagement, money management, leadership best practices, etc.

I would like to think that I do so much more, but the other stuff I do because I care.

I love my students. I respect them. I’m so appreciative for the opportunity to work with the best.

I probably ask myself once a week, how did I get here. Here as in working in an environment that I walked away from with such peace and clarity on why I was closing that chapter of my life. This was not on my list of things to do. I’m not even “financially active” within the organization that I became a member of in May 2010.

but here I am. maybe in the end, it’ll make sense for you and me.

So as a freshman in college, I was so eager…

Eager for classes. Eager to get involved. Eager to be a campus leader.

I even took a 7am English class first semester. DO NOT DO THIS. EVER. lol

I was very focused first semester. no distractions. no parties. no little boy to run behind.

Also, at this particular time no one in my family was greek. I wanted the full college experience and that included greek life for me.

I lived in an all-female residence hall which had to be an assignment from the Lord!

And I saw a flyer on a billboard inside my building. I left it there that day but eventually I took it down because there was too much info listed.

I had no one to ask questions. I had no one to review my packet. I had no one to walk me through “the process”.

But that didn’t stop me at all. I figured if it was supposed to happen, it would. And I would figure everything else out as things begin to unfold.

And from the beginning (beginning as in attending the first event before I was selected to pursue membership), I was like “What did I just sign up for?”

I only told my mom that I needed some money and to this day, I have no clue where she pulled it from but shout out to her for the financial blessing!!! I was the girl who finally got enough courage to ask a member if there was a payment plan? That part of my story is so funny to me now.

The process…

Let’s just say that as a result of being “on line”, my hair started to fall out and my grades dropped so low that I was placed on probation for my “full-tuition” leadership scholarship. I don’t even think I shared either with anyone because I was so embarrassed.

Bowling with the Alphas. This was our first “outing”. I had so much fun that I sometimes forgot that I had to keep the swoop in tact because there was no hair there underneath. The middle pic mush have been beforehand because it’s less noticeable there.

I did gain so much respect for my “line sisters” during the process though and appreciated them letting me into their circle. I was on a line of 3 (Pearlfect Trinity) and they already knew each other beforehand.

The probate…

I hated those outfits. lol but it was literally a last minute purchase. I also bought 2 pair of shoes. The first pair were a little too tight to be “performing in”. I was oh so nervous and just wanted to get it over with. The night came and it went. And now I’m in…

O F F I C I A L L Y

introduced as Triple Threat…

Because of the timing of things, our probate was held during the week of finals. I remember because I was so stressed about which classes I should study for the final and which ones I just needed to not waste my time studying for and pray.

There’s that swoop of mine again trying to cover up where my hair was falling out…

The sisterhood…

So I don’t think my desire to become a member had anything to do with me wanting the sisterhood component as a top priority. I had one of those and we could barely get along or see eye to eye on anything. So one sister was plenty for me. (I love her so much but she would probably tell you the same thing about how we’re night and day) And even though I had a sister, I still felt like we (the chapter) would always get along and we would always be on the same page and we would see things through the same lens.

Boy was I in for a rude awakening. These women were witty and oh so pretty and bold and opinionated and courageously outspoken. I was the baby of the chapter and hadn’t found my voice yet. I learned real quick that I needed to start speaking up too and practice becoming a sound leader within the organization.

Looking back on my time, I know that some girls truthfully didn’t like me. I know that I was the topic of a few conversations. I know that my leadership style wouldn’t have been voted as a top favorite.

I grew some pretty thick skin as a member who was grateful for the opportunity to be apart of something bigger than me. I was not one of the ones who let the letters mold me into somebody that I was not. That’s the ugly part of the sisterhood/brotherhood that most don’t share. True colors come out and you can always tell who isn’t used to being in a position of influence…

On Campus Greek Event
Step Tease Overall Winners
Serving at Graduation as a LaGrange Society Ambassador
Step Tease Casual Wear Category
On Campus Greek Event
Step Tease “Grown N’ Sexy” Category

The influence…

This is the part that I could go on and on and on about. Literally you become a full time influencer and you can’t run. Trust me I tried too. People knew my name and would come up to speak to me as if we had been friends for years. And Lord, I guess because I was labeled as the “friendly one”, I would try to at least be attentive to what they were saying. “They” being people that I never met.

You always question if people genuinely want to be your friend or if they want to be in. This is the kind of pressure that I think you have to prepare for mentally because it’s exhausting after awhile. I didn’t even wear my letters on campus like that because I wanted my message to be that you need to know who you are before you try be the next campus influencer for greek life. Those letters… I think the most important thing for you to do as as a member is to remember your why.

The service…

This was my why. It was my why from the beginning. It remained my why as an undergrad. I loved the campus programming and the community service opportunities. I couldn’t wait to help the chapter strengthen our reach in both areas. I had the wonderful opportunity to serve as VP and we were running the yard when it came to programs and service that year. No shade lol

I enjoyed being in the position but with a smaller chapter, you have to do more work. Double the work on top of that if you have letter wearers within the organization. A “letter wearer” is someone who is on a mission to be seen. Be seen doing nothing but wearing those letters across their chest. Again no shade here either.

So I stepped down as VP after my year in office and I don’t know why, but this had people in their feels. I was stepping down because I had low-key forgot why I was at the university to begin with. Baby I was dedicating more time to planning events than I was studying. I was spending more time creating reservations that I was spending time reading my discussion post for class. I was acting as if though I was majoring in campus programming and was about to flunk out of college all together. I didn’t feel the need to explain this so I made a “selfish” decision and stepped down. I put selfish in quotation marks because that’s how a small portion of individuals viewed the decision that I was making.

Community Service at the Music Hall of Fame
Greek Week Champions
NPHC Garden Dedication
Greek Week Captains. Team Pink Panthers
My sister came to all Greek events in high school. She knew then she was trying to be like me…lol
VP of NPHC speaking at the Garden Dedication