brittany nicole

I thought I wanted to date a guy whose name started with Br, so that for a family tradition all of our kids’ name would follow suit…. Until I dated him and he broke up with me by saying it’s not you, but I think we should date other people before we get too serious. I’m looking like nobody else in our grade first name start with Br 😩

I thought I wanted to date a guy who had pretty teeth (for my kids’sake) until I dated him and realized that his issues were so deep that he would never be able to fully love me. I mean this is when I fully understood that you never know someone’s story until they let you in, and even then they may only give you the short version. 😳

I thought I wanted to date someone who was super talented (You guessed it… For the kids’ sake) until I dated him and even though he would walk me to every class…  rushing me the entire time with his negative comments every period. 😑 

I thought I wanted to date someone who was an athlete so I could be the supportive girlfriend, until I dated him and found myself in an abusive relationship. 😱

I thought I wanted to date someone who was THE perfect gentleman, until I dated him and begin to see that he was so messed up internally that he’d always end up cheating on me to feel as if though he was important to somebody. 🤐

I thought I wanted to date a charming momma’s boy because a guy that respects his momma will respect you, until I dated him and listened to his mom call me everything BUT a child of God so then he began to cheat his way out of the relationship so that she wouldn’t cut him off financially.😶

For those that know me, you’re probably like I really thought Brittany was smarter than this. Trust me as I’m writing this I’m like Why Honey, Why? 

Luckily, I just gave you the short version of my dating life… You’re Welcome!!! 

Now it took me forever to realize that I had been doing this dating thing all wrong, and I began to go through the motions because I was so determined to not just be #TeamTaken, but to remain that way whether the relationship was healthy or unhealthy. If you go back and read my descriptions, you’ll also notice how I kept referring to what I wanted for myself. 

See the issue was… I was truly dating without purpose: No purpose AT ALL!!! 

I was dating to fill a void, dating to have a prom date, dating to be seen, dating to spark up followers/ likes on social media, dating so that my family wouldn’t think I was crazy, dating to catch up with my sister (she’s younger than me by 2 years and has had the same boyfriend since 10th grade, she’s a graduating senior in college now), dating because of the expectation that my surroundings had placed on my life, dating so that I wouldn’t have to deal with any of my own personal issues… 

Basically dating without purpose is equivalent to how to waste precious time… 

I’ve been single for over 2 years now and my perspective has changed on so much, including relationships. I don’t have to give up my body, I don’t need to be taking care of him financially, I don’t need to be with who just looks good on the exterior, I don’t need to date someone who obviously doesn’t love himself, I don’t have the power to change the way a guy thinks, I don’t need to be lowering my standards temporarily because I see potential… Falling for potential will cause you to go blind because you’re trying to see something that wasn’t there to begin with.😂

I’m 24 years old and after all of that dating for my kids’sake, I don’t even have the desire now to have my own kids. I’d love to adopt if it’s the Lord’s will for my life, but that’s another topic for another day. Guess some of those guys got lucky because I was dating them thinking long term about my future and the future of my kids, as if I had any control over how my kids were going to turn out. This is hilarious to me now because I’m like OMG, back then I was doing TOO much. I know God was like who does she think she is??? 🙈

One of my ex boyfriends would always say  to me,”Brittany, you’re going places with or without me in the picture. So you don’t have to plan every step of your future around me. If we’re meant to be together, we’ll be together.”

Ironically, he was the last guy I dated before I found freedom in living for an audience of one… ❤️ 

Matthew 6:34 “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”